


And Deliver us from Evil

by vogue91



Category: Hey! Say! JUMP, Johnny's Entertainment
Genre: Angst, Character Death, Dark, Jealousy, M/M, Murder-Suicide, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-29
Updated: 2018-04-29
Packaged: 2019-04-29 13:31:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 792
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14473770
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vogue91/pseuds/vogue91
Summary: Daiki at kept going at Hikaru’s place seeking for comfort, and had found there nothing but more pain, more grudges to add to his own, a hatred so similar to his that it scared him.





	And Deliver us from Evil

Daiki wanted to stop.

He wanted to stop, but he knew it wouldn’t have been the right thing to do.

He was aware of his pain, he was aware of Hikaru’s.

They were the same, the both of them.

He had seen him cry and he had been the only one, and he had seen him refuse to ask for help, because it was what they both did, because if the problem was ignored then it automatically didn’t exist.

But it hadn’t taken them long to let that mask fall, and reveal how pathetic they were, how inadequate.

It hadn’t take long for them to meet each other’s pain, and understanding that what they wanted, in the end, was the same damn thing.

Daiki had listened to Hikaru talking about Yabu almost like one would about a dead, lost in the memories of an adolescence that had been over for years, but that still left its marks on him.

He had seen him remember those moments and deem them lost forever, suppressed by Kota’s happiness, and happiness that was never going to belong to him.

And in the same way Arioka talked about Kei, and he talked about the time they spent together, about that friendship that had never been something more, and how much he liked having him around, how much he loved his presence, how incapable he was to give that up out of pride only.

And from there it hadn’t taken them long to read the desires in each other’s heart, and telling themselves they were never going to be happy, not like this, because saying it to someone else was so much easier than admitting it to themselves.

Daiki at kept going at Hikaru’s place seeking for comfort, and had found there nothing but more pain, more grudges to add to his own, a hatred so similar to his that it scared him.

They had hurt each other with that unhealthy love they felt for those two people who had no use for them, and had poured on each other all the regrets piled up during years of silence, and instead of feeling relieved by that outburst they had gotten new scars, while they seemed to be content to witness an happiness they were never going to taste, because it didn’t belong to them.

Daiki had grown tired of it that night.

Hikaru was telling him something about Kota, someone about when they were younger, and he did that with that voice absorbed and almost serene, the usual he had whenever he talked about a Yabu that still didn’t belong to Kei, an idealized Yabu, sculpted in his mind that way, so that no one was ever going to take him away from him.

Daiki looked at him, listened to him closely, and he felt sorry for him.

And he felt sorry for himself, because he knew he had that very same look on his face when he talked about Kei.

It was just a flash, a moment of pure aversion, but he couldn’t go back now.

Hikaru’s blood still stained his hands and his clothes, while the knife didn’t leave his grasp, and he felt almost relieved by the thought of having killed him.

Now Hikaru could finally stop thinking. Now he could be at peace with himself and with the thought of Kota, without reality reminding him he was never going to have him.

He could allow himself to believe that love was possible, and Arioka envied him for it.

He leant over the lifeless body, he brushed its features and closed its eyes, finally saying goodbye to him.

Then he took a deep breath and with the same knife slit his wrist, waiting for a pain that didn’t come, because it was too great the relief of thinking he was finally about to die.

He collapsed on the floor, next to Yaotome’s body.

He liked to think they were dying because it was fair, because it was pointless for them to keep existing when all they had to offer to themselves was hate, was regret.

And death was the right path, Daiki was sure of it.

Death would’ve ridden them from the weight of a sick love, and perhaps that itself had killed them, but Daiki didn’t care.

If it truly was like that, then he would’ve closed his eyes forever because of Kei and what he felt about him, and the thought of those smiles that were all for him, because Inoo had always been special, and at this point he didn’t care that he couldn’t be something else for him.

Daiki closed his eyes, looking at Hikaru’s serene face.

He hoped he had the same expression.

He hoped he could finally be free.


End file.
